Being Open

Have you ever had a conversation with someone and in the back of your mind all you're thinking is "Just shut up already!" Well, in this past week I've had multiple conversations with people where that's been raving in my head while I just smile and nod. I'm usually a great listener, but there is one type of conversation that everyone has had at one point where you just want to mute the other person and walk away. The conversation can present itself in various ways, but it all stems from one thing; and that one thing is the fact that you're talking to a close-minded person. Now, before you stop reading just know that I understand and acknowledge that all people possess close-mindedness at times, especially over certain ideas or beliefs. But when you are so set in your ways that you refuse to even listen to another person's perspective, well that's when I kind of lose it. Of course, like I said before, I'll typically just stand there, nod and smile, but in my mind I'm going crazy.

Where is the problem in being open-minded? In considering someone else's perspective before completely bashing it? I feel like especially for those of us in our twenties, we should be a little more open to everything around us. Now, I don't mean that as an excuse to act out; what I mean is to be open to listen and reflect on things that may be different from what you're use to or comfortable with. Transitioning your thoughts from being close-minded to being open will bring along so many new experiences. It's just a way to experience life in a broader way. While for some it may be difficult to open yourself up, I want to challenge and encourage you to just try it! There's no harm in trying and at least you'd be stretching yourself to some extent. So, here are some recommendations on how to become a more open person.

1. Listen to people who have different ideas or beliefs than you. 

By just listening to someone else isn't going to convert you to what they believe. Just give them a chance to speak their mind without shutting down what they're saying. Just because you're against abortion doesn't give you the right to ignore someone who's had one. Give her a chance to tell her story.

2. Be open to new experiences and opportunities. 

One of my friends in particular comes to mind when I think of this one. She has put herself out there more than anyone I know and because of that she has had so many amazing opportunities open up and is experiencing life in a way I one day hope to. Take a chance! Don't shoot something down because it's out of your comfort zone; it may turn out to be the most liberating thing you've ever done. 

3. Give someone a chance who you normally wouldn't. 
Whether it be in relation to dating or a friendship, don't cancel someone out because they're not what you're use to. Again, this is all about breaking out of that comfort zone. I have friends with all sorts of backgrounds and personalities, but I've managed to find some common ground with all of them. They say opposites attract, so don't knock it till you try it!

Don't be that aggravating person who only talks about why they're right and refuses to hear another's opinion. At least start with listening and as you progress in that, you'll naturally start to gravitate towards the others. Be young, be free, & be open. 

A New Perspective for the New Year

Let's face it, every year towards the end of the month of December, we get that piece of paper out and start jotting down our resolutions for the upcoming year. We look back on all the things we didn't accomplish in the previous year, reflect on our mistakes and swear not to make them again, and think about all the ways we can change ourselves in the new year. We obsess over "getting it right" in the new year, like we have some set idea of what that actually is. We swear to change this, this and this about our personality, image, friends, behavior, love life, and so on and so on in the hopes of fulfilling the statement that "This is my year!" And it very well could be your year, but why do we think that change is the greatest way in achieving that? Don't get me wrong, I completely understanding wanting to better yourself and in doing so making some changes in your life, but why focus so much on the change itself? Focusing on the things we want to change about ourselves only points out the areas in our life where we think we fall short, where we think we don't quite hit the mark, and there's a lot of negativity behind that. The most empowering thing we can do as individuals is take a look at our life and find the qualities that we love about ourselves and work on improving those; by doing that, I believe the change in other areas of our life will come naturally. For example, instead of focusing on dieting and hitting the gym this year, focus on eating clean and doing activities that will improve your health. If you think you talk too much, don't focus on talking less, just listen more and take a second to think before you respond to someone. Focus on loving yourself before you focus on finding someone else to love. This year, focus on being happy with who you are and consciously try to find the positives in your every day life. Only then will this year actually be your year. So, with that being said, here are 10 things for me to keep in mind as I walk through each day of this year.

1. Focus on the positives. If this blog post gets 100 negative comments but 1 positive comment, I'm going to appreciate and enjoy that one comment all week and forget about the others.

2. Focus on the qualities I love about myself. If someone thinks my laugh is too loud and obnoxious, I'm just going to laugh louder...I love my laugh, it's a good reflection of my personality.

3. Be completely in the moment, wherever I am and whoever I'm with. I want to take in life on another level this year by giving other people my undivided attention when I'm with them and appreciating all that's around me.

4. Be healthier: mind, body, spirit, and soul. For me, this means including Jesus in my day more and having Him guide me in making healthy decisions all around.

5. Worry less by appreciating more. My hours at work may be getting cut a little more, but at least I have a job...I'm really thankful for that.

6. Be happy with where I'm at in life instead of envious of where other people are. They're not ahead of the game if they're engaged, have a career established or are traveling the world, they're just in a different stage of life.

7. Consider mistakes as a learning experience rather than a pile of regrets. Everything happens for a reason and mistakes allow room for us to grow.

8. Hug more. I'm not a handshake gal and let's face it, everyone could use more hugs.

9. Spend more time with family. Yes, sometimes they get on my nerves, but at the end of the day they're still family and family is everything.

10. Give the youth a chance. I don't care if it's a 6 year old or a 16 year old, but we can't overlook the generation behind us...give them the time of day and I'm sure you'll learn a thing or two.


I hope this post encourages you to be happy with who you are and where you are in life, and also motivates you to take the pressure off of yourself.  Just be you and be happy. Hope this year really is your best yet!